I tried and failed to keep up with a blog beginning in January. What started as an experiment to transition into Veganism changed so drastically that I decided to start over fresh. I came to realize that I wanted to be Vegan for the wrong reason. I thought that by being vegan, I would feel better about myself, that my depression would get easier to deal with, that I would lose weight without even trying. But those things weren’t what drew me to veganism in the first place. So now, three months later, I’m starting over. After taking a step back, I’ve come to terms with the fact that changing one thing isn’t going to suddenly make my life perfect like I had hoped that becoming vegan would do. Instead of changing my diet completely, I’m starting even slower, by working on my physical fitness and mental health first.
I think that what it really comes down to is that I’m still trying to figure out who I am and what I really want from life. What I want the most right now is to be happy with who I am. Right now, I’m working out 5-6 days a week, and focusing on positive thinking. It’s been a year long struggle to try and change things, but I hope that I can finally find the motivation to improve things. I’ve compiled a list of small things that I want to do every day (*) and at least once every week (~) to work on slowing my brain down and finding moments of joy.
* Read at least one chapter of a book for fun
~Go for a hike
~Watch the sunset
Change is hard. Remembering to blog is hard. Its the small things that I tend to forget when I’m busy working and going to class. I don’t want to keep overlooking the things that bring me joy, or the people who make me happy. And so that’s what this blog is about. Not about transitioning to becoming a vegan. This blog is my personal journey to recovering from my depression and anxiety, and finding happiness and a balanced life.